Don’t You Love Me?

During snack time today, there seemed an argument or more like an misunderstanding. Opah and Tukwan were with Ajib and Liya, amused by the duo’s moves, dynamics, and characters.

Ajib: Sis..

Ajib: Don’t you love me?

He was repeatedly asking. Liya was denying her feelings. Me and Opah answered ‘”yes, sure she does.”

Younger sibling wants to be accepted. Older siblings may feel threatened by the birth of new babies in the family. Note to parents: Make time for each kid. Make them feel special and wanted. Spend quality time with specific kid. Love them for who they are……..

Merci

I am thankful for all the wonderful things that have happened in my life. I have a loving and an understanding partner; and beautiful, healthy and happy Ajib and Liya.

Saying ‘thank you’ and “I Love You” although is very straightforward simple but the ritual has been neglected by many of us. Show little appreciation over small things every single day enables us to stay in love for a long time and in return, without fail we will be rewarded with care and love from our family members too.

Parenting as well as growing up needs adjustments and compromises. We grow on daily basis. We renew our faith. We accumulate hopes. We share dreams. And more importantly, we can visualize our happy family for all tomorrows..

Taking Care of You

“Mama, don’t you watch Daddy’s movies. I have nightmares,” Ajib commented. The night before, my husband had watched a nauseating thriller movie. Even the sound track scared me.

Ajib then continued by saying “If you have nightmares, I’m here for you.” I listened carefully and felt so flattered. At 3 years old, Ajib was trying to protect me. How I pray and wish he would grow up to be a gentleman! Ajib would be a caring and loving person.

Intoxicated

I can never give so much love. I have never received so much attention all my life. Having kids, our priorities have changed. Them before ourselves, most of the time.

Liya and Ajib have made me the center of their universe. I must be the last person they see before they go to sleep. And, moi ought to be the first person they see when they open their eyes in the morning. I feel needed…there’s so much love, and I’m intoxicated by love!

E-Cards

“Mama, what’s your e-mail address?” Liya asked me politely.

She then continued, “Mama, I will write it down so I won’t forget.” Liya assured me.

She sent me several e-cards from I Love You to Happy Mother’s Day. I replied and also sent her e-cards.

So, this is part of living and growing up in the modern times.

Apple Raisin Pastry

I was dicing the apples when Liya and Ajib fought to have better view. It was settled a few minutes later when each took turn coming near me. Something distracted them so they left the kitchen for a while. I felt relief because I wanted to caramelize the sugar before adding some apple juice.

Liya and Ajib returned and insisted to help. We used the thawed pastry sheets. Since we only planned to bake for only 6 apple puffs, each was given a chance to pinch the edges. They loved the hands-on activity – folding the pastry sheets, arranging them on the baking pan, cubing apples, playing with raisins, thumb-pressing… So, lessons learnt today were: the OVEN is HOT, consume LESS sugar, counting numbers (slicing, dicing, cutting), electricity for the oven and a little love in homemade cooking.

Habil and Qabil

I read the story of two brothers to Liya and Ajib tonight. One of the brothers listened to evil’s whisper and committed sins. Habil was a kind-hearted, generous and good son.

I wanted Liya and Ajib to get along so badly. I hope they could love each other…no more fighting over seating arrangement at the dining table, crayons and magic pens, fridge magnets and others.. Sometimes, I just let them resolve their issues. By interfering, I am afraid that I will be biased and favoured only one of them. Logically, older sister or brother should give in but younger sis/bro can be the apple of discord. You know how kids can be self-centered..but, on the other hand another issue may arise. What if Liya and Ajib try to get along simply to please me? They are not achieving any truce but only showing a facade of friendship. So, parenting is full of challenges, eh

When we fell out of love..

I’ve seen how a family structure collapsed. Kids on the side, mom goes East and Dad goes South. It was never a pretty picture. Torn in between, children sometimes must choose with whom they want to follow.

 

Factors may include financial problems, extra marital affairs, and family’s influences. Over the years, no doubt our priorities have changed and our physical attractions may have waned. If we forget our oath to stay in sickness and in health or even the promise to grow old together, we maybe swept in our problems and stressful life events.

 

I once received “A Message from the Woods” little handmade card. It was meant as a high school prom invitation card from HY. He drew the cover page. Inside, he popped the question whether I would be his prom date. To cut the story short, I accepted and went to the prom with HY.

 

Of course there are other incidents that we faced together through thick and thin. Life is sometimes playing tricks on us. However, those little things that make us fall in love with the same person over and over again. In spite of many challenges in life, we would stay in love and respect each other.

 

HY and I had dinner with the M’s, an American couple who we have known for about 5 years. Recently on Facebook, DM added a picture dating back 30 years. I have always admired the way they look at each other. Each smile, each stroke when we spent our evening with them made me wonder their ‘secret recipe.’  They survived the 30 years, raised a son and daughter and now they are proud grandparents to a 7-year old boy. To the great couple, DM especially, I solute thee…..